Category Archives: Food One Liners

Sign in restaurant window: “Eat now – Pay waiter.”

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

The four food groups: Fast, Frozen, Instant, and Chocolate.

A friend got some vinegar in his ear, now he suffers from pickled hearing.

Men are like fast food…they never look as good in real life as they do on TV..

It’s called “fast” food because you’re supposed to eat it really fast. Otherwide, you might actually taste it.

I think if I have a good breakfast I could go without food for the rest of the day. I think that until about lunchtime.