Marriage One Liners

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Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.

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Love is talking about having children. Marriage is talking about getting away from children.

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Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.

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Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting,my wife finds out about it right away.

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The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once…

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After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.

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Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out.

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Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

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I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

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There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.

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Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

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Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor’s Degree and the woman gets her Masters.

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A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.

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Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached.

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Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the “y” becomes silent.

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