Then there was the golfer who was sentenced to be hanged. He asked the warden if he could take a few practice swings first.

A professional golfer takes longer to line up a six-foot putt than the Toyota Corporation takes to turn raw iron ore into a Corolla.

I think I’ve finally figured the game out: if it goes right, it’s a slice. If it goes left, it’s a hook. And if it goes straight, it’s a miracle!

If you’re caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.